When it comes to figuring out the opposite sex, sometimes it pays to go straight to the source.we have proven Relationship Advice for Women!” on matters of dating, relationships, sex, and everything in between. Check out their awesome relationship advice for women.
Men and women look at relationships differently. For men, the dust settles once the relationship has started, but for women, they first have to overcome the phase of fluctuating emotions brought by the romantic aspect of the setup, and it takes time for them to see and feel the realities of being in a relationship. This happens to most women, and yes, we can consider it normal, albeit not always talked about.
You see, a lot of people are lazy. They think that relationships should just magically run like a well-oiled machine. But that doesn’t happen in real life. Relationships take effort, and they can be healthy and happy if you know what to do. No one has a magic wand to hand you that will turn your relationship into a fairy tale.
Everyone always says, “Relationships are so hard!” But that’s not true. It’s not relationships that are difficult, rather, it’s the people involved in the relationships that MAKE them challenging.
In other words, you can make your relationship better by doing two things:
- Requiring more of yourself
- Requiring more from your partner
Besides, let’s face it: who doesn’t want to feel loved and “owned” in a romantic sense?
However, it is also very important for women to be level-headed when it comes to being in a relationship. This is simply because when they allow emotions to get the best of them, they may not be able to handle the travails of romantic setups, and this may lead to frequent fights and eventually, breakups.
But how should relationships be handled? If you’re a woman looking for words of wisdom to guide you in this journey, then these pieces of relationship advice and tips below are dedicated to you:
1. Don’t try to change him.
Women are notorious for trying to change their man. They think things like, “If I can get him to lose 30 pounds, then he’ll be more attractive.” Or “If I can just get him to stop playing video games, I’ll be happy.” Or “Once we get married, he’ll change for the better.”
Take this important piece of advice – if you don’t like how his is RIGHT NOW, without any changes, then you shouldn’t be with him. Period. Because you can’t really change him anyway. It just won’t work.
2. Be the pillar of support.
As a woman, you are regarded by your man to be his pillar of support, his comforter in times of stress, the one person who would understand him at his worst. Take this as an opportunity to show your true love and respect for him by being his pillar of support. Be there for him, not only as a girlfriend or wife but as a friend he can count on. After all, you are not only seen as his rock but as his muse, his source of inspiration in achieving his aspirations in life.
3. Have your own life.
You might be crazy in love with each other, but that doesn’t mean the rest of your life should stop. Don’t abandon your friends for him. Don’t take up golf and give up your massages if you don’t want to. Have some independence and an identity of your own. Because if you don’t, things will get boring and routine in the relationship.
4. Be a good listener.
Usually, we think women are good listeners and men are bad listeners. This isn’t true. Men and women just listen differently. Women listen to connect with another person, and men listen to solve a problem. But we all deserve to have someone listen to us. So, don’t forget that your partner needs that too. You think you listen to your other half, but…do you?
Listening is a verb, not just a passive “you’re talking and I’m not” process. It requires silencing your own thoughts and feelings so you can truly tune in to someone else’s.
“Everyone wants to feel heard, but a lot of couples don’t feel heard as time goes on, and that creates a lot of problems,” “Of course, it’s important to express yourself, but you first have to step back and listen.”
After your partner tells you how they feel, repeat back to them what you understand them to be saying. Then say, “Do you feel like I heard you now? Do you feel understood?” If they say no, ask them to please help you get a better grasp on what they’re saying.
And remember this: Even if you don’t agree with your partner, you want to validate their feelings. You are a totally different person with different experiences and perceptions, so you won’t always see eye-to-eye—but if you want your relationship to grow, you should always, always let them know that they aren’t wrong for feeling the way they do.
5. Don’t avoid problems.
No one really likes conflict. Well, maybe there are some people who do, but generally speaking, most people don’t.
So, what happens a lot of the time is they go into avoidance mode. This does not work.
If you avoid problems for years upon years, well, they are going to pile up. And then one day you’ll wake up 25 years later and never be able to sort through them all because they’ve been accumulating too long.
6. Teach him how to treat you.
The behavior you allow from another person is the behavior that will persist.
So, for instance, if early in the relationship he starts yelling at you when he’s angry, you need to correct him by gently saying, “I don’t’ appreciate you yelling at me. I deserve to be spoken to with respect. So, until you do that, I won’t engage in this conversation.”
If you don’t, it’ll only get worse.
7. Don’t ever nag.
Men hate women who have the habit to nag. Who would want to stick to a woman who just blabs and blabs all day, saying nothing but her complaints? Of course, there are situations when you and your partner end up arguing because you don’t agree over things, but rather than bicker about the issue, learn to calm down and relax. The more relaxed the mind, the clearer your thoughts would be, and the more rational the things that you’re going to say.
8. Show appreciation.
Everyone wants to be appreciated by their partner, so what makes you think your man is any different?
Even if he does little things like put dishes in the dishwasher…thank him for it. Thank him for everything and anything he does for you, and then it’ll be more likely that he’ll want to keep doing that in the future to keep you happy.
And don’t forget that he should appreciate you too.
9. Don’t be jealous or possessive.
It’s understandable that we don’t want to share our man. However, there is a fine line between wanting to keep him for yourself and being overly jealous and possessive. These qualities are smothering and usually pushes men way.
Instead, try to be more secure with yourself, so you don’t worry about losing him. And even if you do, you need to know that you’ll be okay anyway.
10. Learn to compromise.
An ideal relationship is one that is able to accommodate compromise. Things don’t always go your way, and as a woman, this can be very frustrating too. But relationships are not like that; they are a two-way street, where you and your partner give and take. There are situations wherein you have to come up with a compromise in order to continue moving forward, and these small sacrifices may reap you better results in the future. When you know how to compromise, you give just the right amount of trust to your partner, and he does the same to you.
Take things easy. Be your partner’s best friend.
Lasting relationships are those that are founded on friendships. So yes, if you’re in a relationship, you can’t just be your partner’s muse; be the best friend, the person to trust, the partner in crime. After all, being in a relationship means you’re going to explore life together, and you better enjoy it.
11. Make sure you connect physically, emotionally, and mentally.
Easier said than done, but these three things are crucially important.
If you’re just physically connected, but you don’t connect emotionally or mentally, then you won’t make it for the long haul.
Or maybe you connect mentally, but your intimacy is just “meh.” The relationship may be doomed.
You have to have strong bonds in all areas of your relationship, so make sure you keep an eye on that from the very beginning.
12. Strive for equal effort.
People always say, “relationships should be 50-50.” That’s wrong.
They should be 100-100. BOTH people need to put in 100% effort every day to keep the relationship strong.
It can’t be 100-20, 100-50, or even 100-99. It has to be equal.
If it gets out of balance, you need to have a conversation about that so you can get back on track.
13. NEVER tolerate any kind of abuse.
Abuse isn’t just about having him hit you or beat you up. Abuse comes in all forms – mental and emotional too.
While physical injuries can heal, the mental and emotional wounds are much more difficult to heal.
So, don’t tolerate it if he tries to belittle you, degrade you, or gaslight you. That’s a total deal-breaker.
14. Prioritize intimacy.
I’m not talking about sex here, though that is incredibly important in a relationship, too. I mean the kind of intimacy that comes from physical touch, genuine eye contact, mutual smiling, etc.—all the tiny moments that make your heart swell.
“These are the things that remind your partner that you’re in this together, that you choose them and are happy you did,”
Touch your S.O. when they’re making coffee (a quick hug around the waist does the trick…just be careful not to make them spill), look at them in the eyes when they tell you about their day, take showers together, sleep naked, snuggle…you know, the PG stuff that makes the day-to-day that much more special.
“If you notice that’s declining, it could be the time to take a moment and talk to yourself about why—is it on your end, theirs, or both?”. If increasing your own initiation of this type of intimacy doesn’t lead to them doing the same, you may want to consider seeing a couples therapist, who can help you both figure out underlying issues.
15. Avoid bringing up your ex
Even if you are just trying to make a point on how your current boyfriend treats you better than your last, bringing up your ex is not a good move. It makes men go crazy, and it just turns them off.
16. Show empathy.
Relationships should not be “me vs. you.” It should be “us” as a team. You can’t constantly be only considering your own perspective about anything.
You may or may not be right, but perception is reality. If your partner sees it differently, try to understand. Show him empathy, and then most likely he’ll show it to you in return.
17. Make time for your partner.
I know I said to have your own life and some independence, but on the flip side, you can’t spend too much time alone (or with other people) because then the relationship could die.
Relationships need attention. So, make sure you go on regular date nights and have deep conversations to keep your connection strong.
The security of a long-term relationship (and marriage, obviously) is freaking fabulous. But a common price for that is how “used to” your partner you become. “There comes a point when we’re looking at a projection or memory of the person, not who they are in 3-D at that moment,”. “That leads you to make assumptions about what they need based on their past—not their present.”
And, of course, people (yourself included) evolve as time goes on, and when you’re with someone for the long haul, it’s on you to recognize how. So whenever you can—on your next date night, while they’re making the coffee, after they get back from a run—take a second to stop and really see your partner with fresh eyes.
Think of three kind or impressive things they did recently, and feel the feels for them. Then instead of “I love you,” try saying, “I see you.” Their reaction could be pretty stunning.
18. Don’t be a people pleaser.
Many women mistakenly believe that if they please other people, then they will automatically love them. This couldn’t be farther from the truth!
A lot of people will take advantage of you if you give too much of yourself. Instead, strive for a healthy balance of being self-less and selfish.
Please your partner, but also make sure they please you too. Relationships are a two-way street.
19. Demand respect.
When I say “demand,” I don’t mean stomping your foot down and demanding in in a diva kind of way. What I mean is that you need to believe that you deserve to be treated with respect at all times – everyone does.
But here’s the kicker – in order to get respect, you need to give respect. So, by being respectful, you are setting the scene for nothing but kind treatment in return.
20. Don’t be needy.
Being needy and chasing can go hand-in-hand. If you want to see him 24/7, text him 24/7, and basically think the world resolves around him, well, you’re being needy.
Needy behavior is suffocating for people, especially men. You think these behaviors will help you hold on to him, but it actually has the opposite effect – it pushes him away.
Like our list of 20 Mind-Blowing Relationship Advice for Women? Tell us what you think in the comments section below.
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