Relationship is beautiful when it is built on the right foundation. It brings an air of freshness into your world and makes you interested in the well-being and progress of your partner. However, past experiences, negative emotions, habits and way of living can turn a relationship into hell. To think that many are stuck due to fear of moving on among others at the expense of their wellbeing is worrisome. That is why we’ll be sharing with you the basis for building a healthy relationship.
In order to avoid stories that touch and the brokenness that comes with an abusive relationship, it is needful that you understand the foundation for building a healthy relationship with your partner so that the love you share can thrive.
Firstly, you must be able to differentiate between a healthy and unhealthy relationship because it takes more than six-packs, big boobs and bums, money or pride to build a healthy relationship.
Since no relationship can last without a healthy foundation, reading this article to the end will guide you to make your relationship better.
In building a healthy relationship with your partner, the effective ingredients needed are:
Wholeness
This is the most important factor to check out for not just in a prospect but also in your life before going into any relationship.
You need to ask yourself questions like: am I whole? Am I living my best life now? Am I single and comfortable in my own company? Am I purposeful or am I just sitting there and waiting for someone to come and rescue me from myself? You have to realise that there is no knight in shining armour or lady luck out there coming to save you and make you feel whole because every person has their own problems.
So, begin by fixing yourself, discover your purpose, be living life before you even conceive the idea of going into a relationship.
Purpose
The next thing you have to look into before going into any relationship is purpose. By purpose, I mean the reason for the relationship and also the alignment of your life’s purpose with that of your intended. So when you meet someone new, you need to ask yourself: what do I want from this person, and does he fit into my life’s purpose?
You have to be honest enough at least with yourself to note all you want from this person if it is sex, money, baby, friendship, marriage or whatever it is. This means that you have to define your relationship and after doing that try as much as possible to see if the both of you are on the same page or if you’re willing to agree. You might want to abstain and he might not want that, it’s important you talk things over so that you can decide if you will go for someone that values your values. You don’t have to go against your values and principles.
Boundaries
After defining your relationship, set boundaries. Yes I know you are in love and there is a thousand butterflies in your stomach right now and you just want to kiss and hug and make love to this person and when you see them you just pause! And ask questions like how much am I willing to go in this relationship right now?
Many unnecessary heartaches, unwanted pregnancies, unneeded abortions and untold guilt would not have happened if both partners set boundaries from the beginning and see to it that they don’t cross them.
How to detect an abusive relationship:
Love
The three steps that I have mentioned so far are the foundations of a healthy relationship. Now let’s move to the building blocks: The thing called LOVE. Love in all its entirety. It takes a combination of Eros, Filial and Agape love. For a relationship to be healthy and balanced, you need to love your partner like your lover, brother and God. Loving your partner like a lover makes you passionate about them.
Loving them like your brother makes you compassionate and understanding while loving them like God entails sacrifice and commitment. If any of these love dimension is lacking then the building would be incomplete.
Read this to know why you are still single
Trust
Is it possible to live in a house without a roof? So it is when trying to build a relationship without trust. There is no covering in that relationship. Trust is what keep you secure in a relationship.
Without trust any relationship would go sour. Without trust the relationship will soon become vulnerable to any attack. There is no point in going into or remaining in any relationship without trust.
So, there you have it. Wholeness, purpose, boundaries, love and trust the ingredients of a healthy relationship.
Kindly share other things you think would help in building a healthy relationship in the comment session.
See also: Important things to note before getting married
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